Many people struggle with setting healthy boundaries. Some sacrifice their own peace of mind to support a mentally unstable parent. Those with a grown child suffering with mental health or addiction issues can find setting limits even more confounding. Just how far should you go to support another person? How much is too much?
Even after recovery, PTSD can continue to make itself known for years after an episode of violence occurs. Case in point, I recently moved to a house that’s a bit of a fixer-upper. Excited to finally own my own place, I bought a pressure washer to take off some of the grime that had accumulated from the surrounding forest over the years.
Does it make you uncomfortable to say “no” to others? Do you avoid telling them how you feel in hopes that the problem will just go away? Do you feel like you are constantly trying to please other people, but at the end of the day they still seem displeased with you? Maybe there is a boss or coworker who completely overwhelms your ability to act; leaving you feeling miserable and resentful long after the workday is over.
Our innate curiosities (both morbid and wholesome) have been fundamental to our success as a species. The engine of curiosity has driven the development of every technological innovation from the wheel to the smart phone. Our curiosity has bestowed the rewards (and responsibility) of ever greater control over our own lives and the workings of the planet. It is no surprise that we have started to equate curiosity with control.
